Navigating Criticism, Feedback, and Pain
“The greatest danger of receiving criticism is not to your reputation, but to your heart.” -Tim Keller
In the aftermath of 9/11, many pastors in New York were working hard to console the grieving and to manage the enormous growth of their churches due to the shockwaves that were disrupting the secular heart of America. Tim Keller shares a cautionary tale reflecting on those days. In the years that followed, pastor after pastor had moral failings or mental breakdowns. Long-serving pastors left their churches and their faith altogether. Why? Keller believes the care given to others, by pastors, in a season of pain, was not also given to themselves. And unattended hearts and souls brought pastors to unhealthy places they couldn’t lead from.
In the next few years, as the pandemic moves into our rearview, what kind of story will unfold about Canadian pastors and churches?
We hope to see pastors like yourself emerge from this season of increased criticism and tension with healed wounds and a growing tenderness, for your sake, and the sake of your family & church. Below are a collection of resources we trust can serve you or those on your team as you process this season. Whether you want to better understand your emotions and woundedness or improve your ability to receive feedback and have hard conversations, we pray for God’s hand of healing and protection over you.
Considering the Heart’s Response to Criticism
In this piece by Tim Keller, he explores a letter written in the 1700s by John Newton (writer of Amazing Grace) in reply to a minister who was seeking guidance before he criticized another minister publicly for his lack of orthodoxy. Keller beautifully calls us to reflect on the impact of receiving criticism and how our hearts often respond. He cautions: “So whatever you do, do anything you can to avoid feeling smug and superior to the critic.”
Curated Content For You
Becoming the Place Where Pain Ends
“I actually think that getting wounded by the people you serve is a part of the pastoral call.” -John Mark Comer
If you haven’t seen it yet, listen to this soundbite from a prior CCLP episode where John Mark Comer reflects on the scrutiny he has experienced, and unpacks his belief that suffering for and from your congregation is not only a part of leadership, but it’s a call for the pastor.
Helpful Reads
Recommended by pastors, for pastors.
Leading When You’ve Become a Target | Terry Walling & Mark Sayers
“The pastor becomes the target because we’ve positioned them as the one in control.” Hear Terry Walling, President of Leader Breakthru join Mark Sayers on Rebuilders to unpack the challenges leaders are facing in these times of heightened tensions and division and how we can hold healthy postures in the midst of it all.